We all at one time or another have been in a position where we were owed an apology but did not get it. It left you wondering and contemplating how a person can not think they should offer one. A lot of times people have many reasons as to why an apology is not given and some people just don’t care. Let’s look at some ways this could happen and how to move forward in life without it.
Guilt– Think back to a time when you were little kids and playing with a friend and all of a sudden the person does something, you run and tell and then the person just stands there. The mediator can tell that person did something. The mediator also told the person what he or she did and they just gave a blank stare or cried. Crying was the emotion to show the person knew what they did but guilt held them back from apologizing. You felt awful too because it was a friend and you all played together and shared toys. Now you’re left trying to figure out why he or she can’t just say sorry. A person not apologizing could occur for various reasons.
Admission– When a person admits they’ve done something wrong it will sometimes leave a bad taste in their mouth. Some can’t handle a road to recovery and repair because it gives admission to what the wrong that happened. Now there are more doors to open as to why the person acted in such a way that dismantled the friendship. To some, that puts too much recognition upon them and the limelight is not their strong suit. They would rather run away, destroy the relationship or hope enough time will pass so the issue is not an issue anymore.
Refusal- Not willing to take responsibility for the action. He or she would rather give excuses, deflects, or lose the relationship entirely. It has more to do with past trauma where he or she didn’t deal with experiences to help heal themselves. Maybe someone owed them an apology and damage caused them to not display the value of an apology as you were owed.
The unwillingness to deal with an issue and apologize can stem from various stages in a person’s life. Sometimes you will have to live without an apology. It is not always up to you to receive an apology, but there are things you can do to heal and thrive in your life.
Time-it is one of the most precious things in life and time will help you heal if you use it wisely.
Forgiveness-this is for you but also to release any anger or frustration you may have with that person. Allow yourself the time to heal and move forward, don’t hold on to pain you didn’t cause it only keeps you from growing.
Self reflection-offers an opportunity to look within yourself and evaluate the types of relationships and friendships you have with others. How did you handle issues in the past (do you need to learn how to handle something differently) and was the outcome better? Did you make a better decision to help deal with future outcomes?
Overall, the power of healing does not mean it shields you from pain but allows you to learn, grow, and empowers the universe to return positive energy, new relationships, and ventures for you to explore.
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